Get Out of Bed!

Part 4 of my story

“The best thing to do when you find yourself in a hurting or vulnerable place is to surround yourself with the strongest, finest and most positive people you know.”

–Kristin Armstrong

When someone’s life is coming down around them, as mine was in early February 2018, crawling into bed seems like a good option. I found myself faced with a choice: I could either stay home feeling sorry for myself or I could live up to my responsibilities and attend regional training for Delta Gamma, for which I am a Honor Board adviser at the chapter of my alma mater, UCSD. I chose the latter. When Ivonne and I left for Pepperdine that morning, it was so early that it was still dark out. I had only known her for about 6 months at this point. It was hard not to think about my troubles, but I didn’t want to be weird so I made small talk for a bit. By the time we picked up Meagan, who I knew for even less time, I thought to myself, “What the heck. I am not going to fake it that everything is fine. I am way too old for this.” So, I told them everything-from losing my father-in-law to leaving my job, selling my house and my marriage woes. I figured that they would either (1) think I was a complete freak but they couldn’t get away since we were all in a car together, (2) they would feel way better about their own lives or (3) they would be kind. Fortunately for me, they chose door #3. So, by the time we took the photo, above, my smile was real-thanks to the support of these ladies were there to listen, not judge (at least to my face) and who made me laugh when I really needed it. It’s so unfortunate that we, as women, feel the need to tear each other down. The rest of the world does it just fine, thank you. We don’t need to help. There’s a quote by Virginia Woolf that sums it up: “For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.” While things are certainly better now than they were in Woolf’s time, as women we still have to work harder than men to prove we are smart and capable. We still have to smile when we don’t want to, while men are allowed to be “brooding.” We are called “bitches” and they are called “strong leaders.” So let’s help a sister out when we can!

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